Movies have been being made for over one hundred years, so it is not surprising that there are some very absurd movies out there. People want to continue to create something fresh and new, and at times that can seem hard and impossible, especially if you limit yourself to one genre to try and create something new. One of the ways to create a new movie that is interesting and gets people talking, is by throwing in some crazy twists, and the movie I just saw did that, and it was totally absurd. It has to be the most absurd film I have seen this year.
That movie is Orphan: First Kill. A movie that released straight to Peacock, but it also went to theaters. Seeing as I do not have Peacock, I flocked to the theater to go see this film knowing nothing about it. So the movie starts in Estonia in 2007, and Leena, a thirty year old woman, that still looks like she is ten, escapes from her mental institution. She kills a guard, and she hides in the trunk of her art therapy teacher’s car. When the therapist makes it home, Leena hops out and kills her. A weird start, but nothing too crazy yet.
Once in the therapist’s apartment, Leena researches missing children in America, and she is able to find a child who is basically her doppelgänger, Esther, who has been missing for a while. Leena goes to the park, and she gets picked up by the police, and she claims to be Esther, and that she was abducted and taken from America. Her mom comes and gets her, and they go back to the U.S. The authorities seemed not to care about any of the details as to how Esther got there, and who was holding her hostage, and the family seemed to ignore the fact that Esther now had a Russian accent and did not remember any of the family memories. Not the most insane thing that could happen if a person went through trauma, but still odd at least, but it goes relatively unnoticed by her now mother, father, and brother, except by Detective Donnan starts to sleuth.
This detective did not seem to believe the story that this new Esther was spouting, and so he decided to do some more in-depth research. Donnan sneaks into Esther’s room, and he swipes some fingerprints. New Esther realizes what is happening, and she follows Donnan to his house, and she stabs him, but before she can kill him, Esther’s mom comes in and shoots Detective Donnan five times. So this kind of blows everything up. Its like maybe this lady is super rich and believes Esther would not do something so heinous without reason, and she just wants to protect her returned child, but no it is even wilder.
Apparently the mom had known that this new Esther was a fake from the start, because Esther’s brother had “accidently” been too rough with the real Esther and killed her, and the mother had helped the brother cover it up, and they claimed she was missing, and the father knew nothing about it. So not only did the mom know this new Esther was a fake, but the brother had known too, but they did not realize that the new Esther was a mental patient that was actually thirty. After burying the detectives body and sending an email to the police office about a leave of absence that would have clearly been a red flag that a detective had been murdered, they returned home. At first the family dynamic seems to be okay, and Esther really has a strong connection with the dad, because they both like art, so the dad suspects nothing, but slowly the brother and the mother start to act like crazed. The mother tries to poison her, and then the brother also tries to kill her. So it turns into kill or be killed. Their lost then found sister, was about to be claimed lost again. Totally unsuspicious.
The new Esther is a little more cunning though, and she ends up killing the mother and the brother, and as the house is burning, the new Esther professes the truth to the dad and says that she is in love with him, but he is repulsed, so she throws him off the roof, and now she is the orphan. What a prequel!
There were times in the theater, that was completely empty, besides me, where I was audibly laughing because the twists kept getting so absurd. Like when the mom and brother both started to try to go after new Esther, and they were basically openly trying to murder her, it was insane. The mom tried to poison her, like that cannot be claimed as an accident! Or when the mom and Esther are cleaning up the murder of the detective and throwing him down in some sewer, and they are bonding while doing it. The best of all was when the mom was helping the new Esther wrap the ace bandage around her chest, to help her continue to look like she was ten, all the while talking about how messed up the situation was, and that neither of them wins if they get turned in to the police. True kindred spirits.
It is also hard to believe, but at times you are feeling bad for the new Esther, yes, the one who committed murder and was in a mental facility, because the family she joined is so unhinged. They make new Esther seem like the sane one. At least new Esther had a plan and goals she was trying to accomplish. She had a bad life she was trying to escape, but this rich family was just having anger issues and too privileged to care about anything.
The movie also repeatedly made references to having a double life. They mentioned it over and over in overt ways that were like okay, I get it, there are two lives going on here. The best way was with the art. Some how new Esther ended up with a super-rich family, and the dad of the family just happened to be an artist, just like Leena was in Estonia. The best part of it all though was that the dad made art that changed when you put the black light on it, and it showed how the person in the painting was really feeling. Just about as clear as you can get that there is a double life thing going on here.
This was like Lifetime movie level twists and turns. I cannot say that it was good, but it was so absurd I had to give it its flowers. It was not really scary but watching any scary movie alone in a big dark empty theater can cause some unease. I would recommend seeing it to really enjoy the insanity of it, even though if you read all of this, I just ruined it, but written words cannot do justice to the art that is this film that was made for less than $500,000. I gave it three stars, even though that may be a little high, but if you want to see a different scary movie, that actually has some jump scares, I suggest The Invitation, now in theaters.
Other Films This Week:
The Invitation: A blend of Get Out and Ready or Not, they know how to drag out the scares effectively, but fails to stick the landing.
Beast: Idris Elba fights lions to save his two daughters. They are experiencing drama after the death of their mother, and now they take their family issues to the safari, and instead of making it a fun movie about getting attacked by lions, it is too self-serious.
Fantastic Beasts: Secrets of Dumbledore: Just read the 7th Harry Potter book and the chapter about Dumbledore.
Me Time: Don’t waste your Me Time on this movie.
The Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring (extended edition): I don’t care how long this was, I did not want this to end. On the Bright side there are two more that are longer, some dreams do come true.
New Rankings:
Orphan: First Kill: 3 Stars
Beast: 2.5 Stars
The Invitation: 3 Stars
Secrets of Dumbledore: 2 Stars
Me Time: 1 Star
The Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring: 4.5 Stars
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