Noah Kahan Leaves the Porch Light on

            This past Friday, Noah Kahan’s new album came out, but the week before that, he had an intimate documentary come out on Netflix. It combines concert footage with interviews and videos from his life. He was overly honest about the struggles that he goes through, both mentally and with his family. Some of the bluntness was surprising, but it was great to hear some of the stories behind the songs and to see the scenery that inspired him.

            Overall, I would consider myself a fan of Kahan, but up until last week, I had not taken the time to listen to all of Stick Season. I was familiar with his more popular songs, and they had been in my rotation regularly, and what I enjoy most about his music is that he blends this melancholic tone with an incredible rhythm. So although the songs can be sad, they are super catchy and raise my energy because I am singing along.

            “Homesick” is my most listened to of his songs, especially in winter, because as he says, “The weather ain’t been bad if you’re into masochistic bullshit.” I think about that line a lot when I am out running, I guess because I am into that masochistic bullshit, I love being able to say that I ran when it was negative six degrees outside. I crave the cold over the heat of the summer. In the song, he also talks about an Olympic runner, and I finally looked it up, because I was like I know of no Olympic distance runner from Vermont, and I was right, because he made it up.

I also found out that I had a serious misunderstanding of a line. I thought that the line was, “I’m me because I grew up in New England.” But instead, it is, “I’m mean because I grew up in New England.” And although I did not grow up in New England, I related to this idea, the cold weather has helped to shape who I am, so I thought yeah, I am me because of New England, but it is mean… Oh well. I am going to keep singing it my way.

            It is funny though, because he has this line, and he has another song called “Northern Attitude.” This is also about being from the north and being cold towards others, “Forgive my Northern Attitude, oh, I was raised out in the cold… I was raised on little light.” But the thing is, he does not seem the least bit mean. He seems like he is down to earth and a regular guy. He seems to really love his family and where he is from, and all his interactions with others including strangers seemed like he was a nice guy.

            The one part of the whole documentary that really bothered me was the portrayal of his father. Admittedly, his father seemed like a weird guy, but as they discuss, the growth of his weirdness was spurned on from his father being involved in a serious accident when he was out riding his bike, where he sustained brain damage. His dad was a triathlete, and he was training for the Lake Placid tri, when he was hit by a car. They said that when he was in the hospital, he was trying to sneak out to go for his runs to train, so maybe I am being overly sympathetic to this man because I love his commitment.

            There was one scene in particular that really bothered me. It was during the Boston concert, he told the crowd to cheer if their parents were divorced, and then he said just know that it is not your fault. Then after a pause, he said that it was your dad’s fault, and then the documentary camera panned over to where his dad was standing by himself watching the concert, while the rest of his family was with his mom. This felt just overly mean and unnecessary, especially knowing that his dad was there. To be fair to Noah, he does admit to being overly hard on his dad, and he said that he should have more patience.

            The other big part of this documentary was Kahan’s honesty about his body dysmorphia. He was overly brutal about his body image and unnecessarily so. He thinks that he is so fat and gross, and although he lacks any muscle or definition. He was by no means fat. It was funny that he was willing to talk about this part shirtless though. He is sitting there almost in tears without a shirt on, that takes some guts.

            In general, his main charitable cause is mental health. He has more struggles than just his body dysmorphia, he has also struggled with fame. During part of the documentary, he was talking about how hard it is to live in Nashville. It makes sense for his career, but all people want to talk to him about there is his career, whereas back in Vermont, even with the success, they still just treat him like a normal person, so it was great to see him move back home at the end of the doc.

            He also mentioned a struggle with coming up with new songs for his new album, and that combined with his body dysmorphia and general mental struggles, it seemed like this newfound fame was a lot for him. So honestly if after this album and this tour he hung it up, I would not be surprised, and I would be proud of him for it. My other idea that I came up with on a run, is that he should just create a concert venue close to his hometown, so he can stay close by, and then if you want to see him, you must make the trek to New England.

            I absolutely loved this documentary. It made me tear up multiple times with its emotional vulnerability. It is hard to fully explain, but there was something about the family dynamic that did it. At the end of the Boston show, his whole family came out on the stage and did like a group hug, and even after all their turmoil, they can come out there and rally around their boy, that is love and beautiful.

            As far as the new album goes, the two singles he released “Great Divide” and “Porchlight” are by far my favorites. I will probably listen to “Great Divide” more than any other song this year. The rest of the album has his signature sound and tone. I listened to it while running and doing chores, so I do not have a firm grasp on all the songs, but many of them felt like they bled into each other because they are similar. This is not a bad thing; it is a vibe that I love to sit in (or run in). My real discoveries from this Kahan deep dive how ever were “You’re Gonna Go Far,” which gives me goosebumps every time I listen to it, and “Paul Revere.” I give the documentary 4 stars, and I also recommend listening to the new album!